DH knocked me for six with this Q!!

[~Miss Cinders~]

He has asked me if it's possible to reverse my tubal ligation! WT?!

He has always wanted 9. I've always wanted lots & lots!!

I was sure before Benji I was done, finished. But I have wanted more secretly for a long time. But know it's not a good idea. For 1, my body probably wouldn't cope. 2, I have troubled pregnancies - Benji was flexed breech, also started the pregnancy with a subchorionic haematoma... in other words lucky to have him. Tiarne I suffered from extreme Polyhydramnios, hospitalised for the last weeks on bed rest. Ended in em c/s. She was in NICU due to many life threatening problems EXTREMELY lucky to have her. Along with a m/c @ 3 months gestation, one @ 5 weeks gestation. A pregnancy with early labour @ 16 weeks. One with which I suffered from SPD, ended up being born 9lb 10oz!! And one born 3 weeks early. So we've had abit of a ride where babies are concerned!!

Not even going into the issues DH & I have had lately! Which is one of my reasons for not wanting to have another, even though I'd love more!

Am I mad for considering it? I have told DH ask me when Benji is 5 (he's nearly 2 now). He says he wouldn't consider IVF IF I was to agree.

[rollergirl]

LOL Donna at your DH wanting 9! I was one of six children, and having a family that size required a tremendous effort from both my parents, although they definately both enjoyed having a large family.

It sounds like you have some very valid reasons to be hesitant ATM, espcially if you feel your body still needs time to recover. Maybe your DH would be interested in helping a child from the World Vision program in the interium?

[melchpeppi]

WOW!!! My DH wants to stop at one!! He was one of 5, loved it, but wants no more now

Ah well, I will give him a year or two, he will change his mind!

You arent crazy for considering it - parenting is a labour of love and wanting to add another is a totally natural feeling . Whatever feels right is right, and if your body needs to get over what its endured, so be it!!!

[2thorns1rose]

No way are you crazy considering it hon! Maybe just wait and see how the things that are making you hesitant pan out first?

Huggles
Kirsty

[~*Bron*~]

personally we stopped at 4 because pregnancy would be too hard on my body

[~karen~]

each to there own - personally with your history and the fact you've had a ligation and you have is it 8 already? wait a while, see how you feel, see your doctor - if it's clips they can be removed but that doesn't guarantee patency by any means. but it's easy for me to say this cause i've never understood the whole must have more babies thing. just me, from my life experiences. but i think you should probably prepare yourself if you are really considering more children that it may be a battle, that surgery may be refused or unsuccessful, and that you may have more problems with pregnancy. (not trying to be pessimistic here just a bit realistic). of course if it's what you want and it happens then i hope it's all wonderful for you all.

are there other ways to fill your mothering instinct gap than the 8 (i think) children you have. the world vision idea was a good one. fostering. volunteering. wildlife carer. perhaps your hubby could become involved in scouts or a sporting team as a coach.

just my thoughts and way different to many others i know. perhaps a different perspective isn't wanted - so if not please disregard my ramblings - before i had ally i wanted 4 kids - now i know for a fact that i personally would not be capable of being the parent *i* want to be with that many children as close as i'd need to have them now i'm old.

good luck
the things we ponder huh???
hugs
kaz

[robbo3]

WOW! You have been through alot - 7 pregnancies and 5 children to look after !!!

I am amazed you are considering it, not becasue its crazy, just because you have endured so much. I say see how things go.....I consider having more babies everyday but we are finished with 3... I figure I will always be wanting more but if I make this decision with my head and not my heart , well.....there will be no more.

3 years is a long time - I think if you get to your youngest childs 5th birthday and really want it then go for it....but with all that it involves I think that it could be a lengthy process to fall and carry to term.

Cheers.

[~karen~]

doh - there are 5 in your sig. where did i get 8 from???
sorry
kaz

[--narelle--]

WOW I bet he did knock you for six! Sorry... LOL.

Um I was going to suggest alternatives to having your own child too. Maybe that would be something you could look into doing soon and then see how your desires go as far as having another one of your own.

But you are definitely not silly for thinking about it. Some people are just made for big families and you must be one!

[Kezmo]

Depending on what method was used, tubal ligations can be reversed.
I son't htink your silly for considering it, i know i only have 2 right now but i definitely want another even though everyone says i'm crazy cos i've got one of each, and i can also see myslef never wanting to stop - but my DH won't allow that
You gotta do what you feel is right for yo uand your family, good luck with your decision!
kez