what to do...

[Candice]

we are in a bit of a tricky situation with bryn atm

Because of a nasty rash he has spent alot of time with no nappy on.. and so i worked with him a little and he would be controlling his wees and doing them in the garden (we were outside mostely for it) now.. he refuses and hates! wearing nappies.. and knows when he wants to go to the toilet but will refuse to use a potty or the toilet and ends up standing in the bathroom sobbing refusing to put a nappy on and refusing to use the toilet and not knowing what to do, till he pees there on the floor and just cries.. he gets soo upset, and then so do I.. i am really not sure what to do.. this wasnt planned, it just happened that way.. i dont want to start forcing the issue.. i just think he is really mixed up with it all.. i didnt know i was confussinghim

what could i Do?

[Eilleen]

Same thing happened with Jade - she decided the rug was her potty and refused to actually go in the proper place(s).

Nothing much happened in the end - after 3 weeks of me persisting and telling her over and over where to go, one day, she just started going to the potty and that was it. I'm sure during the 3 weeks, I honestly thought it would never end but now its a distant memory.

[Candice]

hmmm i will keep trying.. people are telling me bribes and rewards.. but he is soo disressed that saltanas (his fave) are the last thing on his mind

[caznjj]

I would often sit on the loo and get Jordan to sit on the potty next to me. It's as much play as it is learning
to be honest he might be just a bit young to properly "get it" - I'm going to duck now before the EC people jump on me LOL - the reason I say that is he's really only 18mo. Jordan is a year older than him and has just "got it" in the last month.

Will he take a nappy on overnight or for naps? At least then you'd catch the two biggest wees of the day?

[Candice]

yep he will take a nappy for naps etc.. but with a little protest.. i have tried what you mention but he will not come any where near the potty he will sit on the big toilet momentarily but will then want to get off..

he just doesnt know where to wee.. he doesnt want to wee in his nappy either, he will do the same thing if he is wearing one.. unless really busting and distracted then he might wee in his nappy

[caznjj]

hmmmmm
I guess you need to just work out whether to push the issue now of getting back into nappies or out of them altogether. i certainly wouldn't be pushing the potty/toilet because you don't want to create any fears of them.
I'd recommend just leave the potty next to the loo and whenever you go to the loo invite him to sit with you, but don't worry if he says no. Like I said before, it's a game for them to start with
Jordan also used to get very distressed when he wee-ed on the floor - at least you know that part is normal!

He might not want to wee in the nappy becase of the rash, maybe it was stinging him, so he assosciates weeing in the nappy with hurting?


To encourage him to wear a nappy i'd try getting 2 or 3 out and asking him to pick one

[Candice]

hmmm might try a few of those things.. lol he already picshis nappies *giggle*

how would i go having him sit on the loo with me .. would that maybe work?? then there is that security and it is not so scary...

[Bek]

i often sit backwards on the loo with ben, so i'm holding him in position. you could also try standing up and peeing in the potty, or even just going outside to pee? or using the 'classic' ec psition where you hold them over a sink/toilet/potty or wherever you want them to pee.
younger kids, even when aware they need to go, often need more help with the actual going part, unlike an older toilet-independent child, iykwim.
take a look at some of the ec sites for some ideas maybe?

[Katanya]

oh poor little guy

i am not sure exactly but Felix when through something like this with the potty for a week or so awhile ago, after loving it he then refused to use it and would hit me if I tried to take his nappy off to let him sit, something triggered it but eventually I confinced him that the potty was hsi friend again.

What sort of potty do you have? Felix has a turtle and I find that we make it like a game and not such a pressure thing and that worked quite well. he also can straddle it rather than sit if you know what I mean?

it make a big difference!

hope he gets through it- it must be heartbreaking!

[Peach_Bums_Mum]

I was gonna suggest holding him over the toliet / potty too. Not sure as I never did ec with Houston at an early age - he just sort of trained himself at about 2.5 years, so I dont really know much about the techniques. Hope he gets it worked out soon, poor little guy I have heard that roll playing with a doll or teddy on the potty can work well - not sure for younger children though? Might be worth a try if he has a doll or teddy he loves.