A question for you experienced toilet trainers

[Bec259]

As I have said in previous posts, Alex is more than happy to go to the toilet at Day Care & do wees, but he won't do them at home. He's never had an accident at Day Care & has been wearing trainers there for about a month.
He will wear training pants or jocks at home & very rarely have an accident, only 3 in the last 3-4 months that he's been wearig the trainers & jocks.
I'll ask him if he wants to do a wee & if he says 'no', he won't sit on the toilet & I don't want to push the issue. If he says yes, we make a big, excited fuss & sit on the toilet, but nothing is happening.
He can hold on for ages, which I feel isn't a good thing.
So anyway, my question is, how often do you sit them on the toilet?
I've been aiming for every 20min, but sometimes he just refuses to sit, but I know when he starts grabing himself that he must have to go.
I've tried running the water from the sink, giving him toys, singing etc. I don't want to push him, but if he's doing wees at Day Care, he's obviously got the general idea.
I'm just not sure if there is more I should be doing, or just keep going the way we are......

[MyPinkWagon]

I had similar issues with my oldest. What helped for us was wees on the grass as he was really keen on that and a little reward like a choc bit. Stars or other stickers didn't work and I tried a few times to get him interested on those.

Have you tried a potty at all? My second son didn't want to do the toilet but went on the potty. Maybe because it was his alone IYKWIM.

The little mites can act totally different at daycare. It's almost like they come home and get all cunning and do the opposite of what you want just becasue they know you have no control over how they go to the toilet

[missymoo84]

I had 2 things that helped us along. Jaidan was 3 and Chase 2 when I tt them both at the same time.
Jaidan loved the sticker chart and Chase loved flushing the toilet. That was the most exciting part.
Could it be that the toilets in child care are small for little bottoms? Maybe take him to BigW/KMart and let him get a cushie tooshie for the big toilet so he feels more safe?
Otherwise try getting him to stand (if you don't already). There wasn't a male in this house so the boys learnt sitting but when they could stand they were even more eager to go to the toilet like a big boy.
Does he actually go to the toilet at home? Maybe he just doesn't like you asking him? I mean I know I wouldn't like it if I kept getting asked if I needed to pee haha
If he IS going just let him be. It does take a little while for them to know that they should go straight away to avoid accidents. We haven't had one in about a month but we still have them when the boys are to interested in playing to go to the toilet haha

[missymoo84]

I just noticed he is almost 3. Just leave him at that age. He is obviously going when he needs to and the toilet would be annoying if I had to sit on it every 20 minutes. Just let him be without making him sit or trying to get him to sit. 20 minutes is much to regular if he is using it at daycare fine and for his age. Chase is 3 and 2 months and he drinks a lot but he still only goes about once every 1-1 half hours and he just goes on his own (unless I catch him watching the telly doing a jig lol).

[mum2miya]

You know Bec, I was reading one of our Dr Karl books the other day and he says that it's a good thing to be able to "hold on"...that going "just in case" can actually train the bladder to hold less urine before signalling it is full. So going on his advice I'd say not to worry about Alex holding on for ages.
No advice from me on the rest of your post. Miya did it all herself and Toby doesn't have a clue yet lol!

[~*Rebecca*~]

FLynn did it himself too and I can ask him and he will say "yes or no" but he won't just let me take him just to try unless we are going in the car then I insist.

I have a friend whos child will only use their toilet so if he is at daycare all day he just hangs on.

[Theresa]

I'm not much help either I'm sure, but with Em we just let her go when SHE wanted to.... the sitting her on the potty frequently just caused us more arguements, so we let her do it on her own... sure there were a few mishaps but not many and we were far happier

Georgie pretty much did it herself (well for days at home - still haven't braved going out yet!), so she was totally different again!

[kermi]

A trick that usually works for my boys if I need them to hurry a bit, is to go and wash my hands in the bathroom sink quickly.
The running tap, no matter how short it is on for, seems to trigger it for them.
Only Joel left to go now...